still laughing about yesterday during gender/sexuality studies class when our professor had everyone chant “VAGINA! PENIS! VAGINA!” a few times to make us more comfortable with saying those terms
and this girl just stands up slowly and says “…this… this isn’t math class…”
When will this go away? This pain the pain of missing you. Of wanting you so much that I dream of you so often. And yet sometimes I wake up and cry because it was just a dream but you’re more than a dream to me you’re reality, you’re fantasy, you are my hopes, my happiness, my love, my everything. Atleast I.wanted you to be. But you’ve moved on. And now I sit here waiting for this midnight bus tired from work wondering why God is putting me through all this. Wondering if he’ll return you to my arms and wondering if life is really even worth living, when you’ve got this huge burden of knowing you weren’t enough for the one you live for, the one you care for, the one you truly love. Where is the point God if you’re out there can you answer my prayers please. Please I’m begging you. Give me an answer. God? Anyone? Please those around me seem to know I’m hurting but don’t understand the degree of my pain. They don’t understand that for that short time that she was mine I called her “home.” And I loved her more then I thought could be possible. That the mention of your name could make or break me completely. They didn’t know that my life goal has changed because of you. Yes. It has changed. Now my only wish is not to be a great painter, but to live the rest of my life with you. In a life where you’d give me you. And I’d give you me and together we would be us. So if you ever read this.
Dana Francis Jaramillo, I love you.
Yours truly Gabriel Ramirez.